A Week at the Theatre

Before I move on to more current events I would be remiss if I did not mention my recent theatre excursions. I wont lie, I absolutely love living in London. However, there are things I really miss about living in Seattle. One of things I miss the most is the regularity of my trips to the theatre, along with my theatre going partner, the fabulous Margaret.  So when I heard that she was leading a theatre tour in London I literally jumped up and down with excitement!And due to yet another stroke of luck I was able to attach myself to the tour group and see a full schedule of incredible theatre.

During the course of the week we saw an amazing range of plays - from the classical to the contemporary, from the comedic to the dramatic. All of them inspiring and enjoyable in different ways.

We kicked off our theatre tour at Shakespeare's Globe, with an absolutely gorgeous production of The Tempest. Now, although I know the play quite well, I had never seen The Tempest performed live. I would feel confident in saying that this was perhaps a near perfect experience of this play. Not only were we at the Globe, which is a gorgeous space - and really it's hard to find a better venue to see a Shakespeare show, but the productions itself was just lovely. Everything was presented simply, there was no need to update or embellish anything or add ridiculous gimmicks, just a clear and classic beautiful presentation of the show. And there were some really lovely performances. I particularly enjoyed the lovers. And Roger Allam, who played Prospero was just breathtaking. His control over his voice, and the crowd is just stunning to experience. You could hear a pin drop during his final speech. All in all just a wonderful way to start the week.

From Shakespeare we moved along to the Grand Dames of British Theatre. First up was Helen Mirren in The Audience, a play about the weekly audiences the queen holds with her Prime Ministers. The show was really fascinating, but I found myself really wishing I knew more about the history of British politics. I occasionally got a bit lost in trying to figure out where we were in history. Even with this lack of foreknowledge I found the play riveting. Watching Helen Mirren transform herself throughout the evening, playing the queen at many different points in her long rule, was a master class in itself and really incredible to watch. Apparently the script is constantly changing to fit current events. We saw the show quite soon after the death of Margaret Thatcher, and this had already been incorporated into the script in some really interesting ways. I would have been interested to see the play beforehand because I think the new material added some very interesting depth to the second act.

The following night was Judi Dench and Ben Whishaw in Peter and Alice a brand new play about the real life people that the characters of Peter Pan and Alice in Wonderland were based on. I think out of all of the theatre we saw that week this was my favorite. It was certainly the play that stuck with me the most, that I found myself thinking about and mulling over in the coming weeks. The play itself had gotten mixed reviews, most said the performances were wonderful but the text was not terribly strong. I am not sure I would agree with that. It might not work as well without the right people in it, but the play itself was incredibly powerful. It ran straight through, without and intermission, and took the audience on a huge roller coaster of emotions during that time. I found it really powerful. And oh my goodness were the two of them amazing!! Just gut wrenchingly wonderful and heartbreaking. I loved it.

A bit later in the week we mixed things up with a production of Pinter's The Hot House. Now, I will fully admit that Pinter is not one of my favorite playwrights, and I think that this is because I haven't seen many good productions of his work. Often they are terribly overwrought and slow, and just kind of painful to sit through. Not so with this production (well ok there were some issues, but I will get to them in a minute). The play itself was fast paced, and incredibly funny as well as being intensely dark and creepy. Simon Russell Beale and John Simm, along with the rest of the cast, were just phenomenal. However my fellow audience members and I found ourselves rather distracted during the first act.

Let me set the scene for you: For this production the theatre had placed about four rows of seating on the stage itself, behind the action. Most of us who were sitting in this extra section had given some thought to the fact that we would become part of the production. We all wore muted colors and arrived prepared to be on our best theatre behavior. Then at the last second we were joined by two others. Now, I am not sure where this couple came from, but they did not seem to be your typical Harold Pinter audience. In fact I am not sure they had ever been to the theatre before in their lives. They behaved more like they were at a football game than anything else. You could smell the booze coming off of them in waves. And not only did they chat with each other throughout the first act they tried to pull the actors and the rest of the audience into their own personal experience of the show. The woman announced loudly just how famous John Simm was every time he came on stage. The two of them made out for a large part of the act, kicking those in the seats around them in the process. And just generally they were the absolute worst theatre patrons I have ever ever experienced. You could see the growing frustration in the actors and the audience members around them. At one point the poor woman sat directly in front of the two of them tried to intercede, reminding them that they were not the only ones trying to enjoy the performance and asking them to lower their voices. She found herself then being shouted at by this woman and eventually had to give up. When the lights came up at intermission I went and spoke with one of the ushers, who knew exactly what had been going on and assured me something was being done. Apparently the director had also been in the audience, and was absolutely livid! So this couple, who bolted to the bar as soon as the lights came up, were asked politely to leave the theatre. The woman immediately began a tirade about how she had two children, and that the theatre staff couldnt treat her that way. It turns out that they could, and did. And really, what does having kids have anything to do with the way you behave at the theatre?? It was an absolutely astonishing display, I have never experienced anything like it. It really is unfortunate that they didnt just kick them out earlier, as I think most of us missed a lot of the first act. However, once they were gone the experience became infinitely more enjoyable. The relief in the room was palpable once the second act got under way.

The rest of our theatre going time was much less dramatic. Margaret and I closed off the week with a new play at the National, called The Table. The production was sleek and lovely with some really lovely performances and great music. The play itself was perhaps not an enduring work - it took quite a long time to tell you just whose story this was, and was a little unfocused. But, you can really tell just how much care and time goes into the productions at the National. It is really nice to see shows, especially new works, that feel that solid and secure - and this was the show put in their temporary space.

The final show of the week was our musical choice - Merrily We Roll Along, and what a great show to end on. A really great production as well. The show itself may have some snags structurally, - as Margaret said, it is rather difficult to recover from having your 11 o'clock number 20 minutes into the show; but it still really an enjoyable ride. And wow that number was a doozy, just fantastic! I do love a Sondheim show.

Since then much has happened and I have lots of stories, which I will get to in good time. Really I think I just need to start saving them all up for my autobiography. For now all I will say is that this summer is certainly going to make an interesting chapter!

Catch the Rabbit!

Well, it has been a whirlwind couple of weeks. We are just reaching the end of our third week since we began rehearsals (the second full week) and we have already done 5 performances, with one more to go tomorrow. Of course, we still have to put up an entire other show in the mean time, but I am getting ahead of myself.

Let's see, three weeks ago I had just gotten the show offer. I spent the weekend in a state of suspense. The only concrete information I had was that we would be touring two shows 12th Night and The Tales of Peter Rabbit and Benjamin Bunny. The rest - which roles I would be playing, how many people would be in the cast, where we would be performing; all a mystery. This was both quite nerve wracking and just a little bit exhilarating. Just a little.

To say that we hit the ground running would be an understatement. We jumped right into blocking in the very first session, assigning roles as we came across them. We were taught music on the fly, by ear, and to make things more interesting I have had to learn to play the flute! Now, to be fair I did play the flute years ago. Many years ago. Like, 15 years ago. Its been an interesting experience. Well, to be honest it has been a pretty hectic experience. Its been a little overwhelming, for everyone I think.

With all of that, we put together the entirety of Peter Rabbit in about a week. This is a show that involves music from beginning to end, split second costume and character changes and lots and lots of running. Throughout the show I play a bunny, a mouse, a cat, a farmers wife, a flower and a bird. I speak in 3 different accents - none of them my own. I play three instruments, take part in two chases and a fight scene, build and break down a pretty major set (including a stage). All that and more. And that's only one of the shows.

We have spent this last week taking the show to schools in the morning and coming back to rehearse the Shakespeare in the afternoon. Remarkably this week has actually been a lot more relaxed than the last. I am sure we will go back to a state of panic next week when we have to solidify all of 12th Night in a week, but we'll leave that for then. For now I am going to enjoy an evening on the couch, then early to bed to learn my many many many lines for next week.

This is my Keychange

It is kind of incredible how situations can change. Last week I was stuck at home, worried that I was reaching the end of my time here in London. Although things had been going well - I got my work visa, my first professional job, my first voice gig and a voice agent - auditions were few and far between. I took a long hard look at my finances and had to admit to myself that I couldn't support myself on my savings for too much longer. The big shows had pretty much all finished casting, and I didn't really have anything on the horizon.

Then I got some auditions! As we finally round the bend into the warmer seasons theatre companies have started casting open air and summer touring shows. I had an audition last week for a Shakespeare production based about 2 hours outside of London. And another audition for a touring show doing Shakespeare and Beatrix Potter - a unique combination if you ask me.

And well, to cut a long story short, I got the call this afternoon. I got the job!!! I will be touring 12th Night and the Tale of Peter Rabbit through the end of the summer. This means many things - mostly that my visa will get renewed and I will get to stay in the UK for another year!

Very very excited. Now off to go celebrate!

Climbing the Walls

I don't handle free time very well. That's not to say that I don't enjoy a break every once in a while, or that I don't know how to manage my own time. No, what I mean is that I really don't like not having a project. In the past I have always filled my time with as much organized activity as humanly possible. In school this meant taking twice the number of classes required, after I graduated that meant working multiple jobs while performing in the evening. Needless to say I thrive under pressure and I like a full schedule.

Now, for perhaps the first time in my life I find myself unable to do this. On my visa I am only allowed to work in the arts. This means that I cannot get a civilian job to help either pay the bills or pass the time. This is a big problem for me. What it does mean is that I can really focus on theatre, which is part of the reason I moved to London in the first place. I found myself working a full time job that made me really unhappy, and I wasn't doing the work I wanted to. So now I am in a situation where I cannot take another job. It is a weird experience. I am kind of losing my mind a little bit!!!!!

Like any period of unemployment it has its ups and its downs. On the up side it does mean that I can focus completely on what I want to be doing. I get up and I often have the house to myself, so I can sing and be as loud as I need without disturbing anyone or feeling self conscious. I joined another audition listing site, one that I am in control of so I can submit myself for auditions. Up until now I have left that mostly in the hands of my agent. And as someone who is used to taking care of everything myself that has been rather difficult for me. I have a few auditions lined up for the next week, so hopefully something will come from one of those!

The downs are all the normal things you would expect. Anxiety about money, frustration at not having a job, fear that I will never get one. Nothing that is out of the ordinary. The trick is trying to avoid dwelling on all of these worries. I have learned that this is difficult to accomplish while cooped up at home with possibly the worlds worst cold. Not quite sick enough that I was bed ridden, but too sick to accomplish much. However I am now fully recovered and back up on the horse.

Even while I was sick I did manage to accomplish something, actually it was something really important. I finally got myself a voice over agent! This is something that I have been working on for about a year now. After one false start last year I have actually achieved one of my big goals for the year. Very very excited about this.

In all honesty, although it has been a very frustrating month, I am actually in a pretty good place professionally. In the year since I graduated I have managed to sign with both a theatrical and a voice agent.I have auditioned for a handful of shows, including a few West End productions. I have had one professional contract with a prestigious company. And I have managed to secure for myself (for the time being at least) a UK visa. Not half bad. I still have a lot of work ahead of me, and I am sure quite a lot of frustration and anxiety to go with it. But all in all, I'd say absolutely not bad.

Somewhere

Well, it has been over a week since the last performance of WSS. I have found it surprisingly hard to return to every day life in that span, and even more difficult to attempt to explain how I am feeling. Between our two weekends of performance I was both a physical and emotional wreck. I lost my voice, I was exhausted, I am not ashamed to admit that I was very close to tears for most of the week. I assumed that the week following the close of the show would be very similar. In some ways I was right and in some I was wrong. But I am getting ahead of myself. I'll start with Wednesday.

I met up with my carpool first thing in the morning, at the grocery store. Wednesday was a two show day, which meant that we would be spending our dinner break with the boys and would be bringing in food for an informal potluck. These meals were some of my favorite parts of the entire process, an hour of quality time with the entire cast. We would bring in a range of goodies - from fresh fruit and veg to a huge assortment of biscuits and chocolate. And in return we would get a lot of great reactions from the guys. I remember one guy just sort of sitting there, speechless looking at all the food spread out picnic style on the floor. He was just dumbfounded that we would go out of our way to do this for them. We also had a few guys who demanded to know why we hadn't brought certain things, or who would try and smuggle out entire trays of cookies before anyone else had a chance to sample. So, like I said, a full range of reactions. But either way these meals were always a good time. A lot of chat, a lot of joking around, everyone relaxed. Really nice.

So we buy our groceries and trek out to the prison. Two shows on Wednesday, plus a several hour drive to get there. We were all pretty knackered by the end of the day. The shows went well, and everyone was glad to be back and working again. Our digs were another story entirely. At different points during the week we had no phone signal, no Internet (these two were basically a given), no gas, no heat, no hot water, no cooking facilities.... basically we had beds. But we were really really close to the prison. It was interesting. But it definitely added to our state of mind during the final week of shows.

The first of the two shows on Wednesday was for employees of the prison. It was one of the most interesting audiences we had during the entire run. They were absolutely silent during the entire performance. Really no feedback, whatsoever. No laughs, no gasps or reactions, really just active silence. No one was really sure what this meant. Even when it is quiet you can usually tell when an audience is just being really attentive. This came across differently somehow. However when we got to the curtain call there was thunderous applause. It was if they had saved all of their noise until the very end of the show. It was kind of amazing. After bracing ourselves during the whole show for nothing, it was almost overwhelming.

I do wish that we had more of those performances. The ones for the people in the prison, both the inmates and the employees. I think it is great to invite the general public to the shows as well, don't get me wrong. I wish that everyone I know had come and seen the show. I think just being in the audience is an amazing growth experience for everyone. However I think that this is even more the case for those involved in the day to day of prison life. I think really outside of our little bunch, no one knew exactly what was going on in our rehearsal process. I know that a lot of the prison staff thought we were a nuisance, and that the security state was heightened the entire time we were there. So to finally get a chance to invite them in to see the work we had done, everything the guys had accomplished, was absolutely necessary. Now I know that we didn't win everyone over, but really if we got even a few people thinking about how the arts can help in prisons then I think we accomplished a lot.

We had a day off on Thursday, which was really nice. Several of us went into Bath and spent the day sort of mooching around. Unlike the few days at home, where all I wanted to do was go back to work, this was actually really relaxing. Maybe it was being outside of my normal surroundings, maybe it was being with the cast as opposed to sitting at home by myself. Whatever it was, it was a much needed respite to prepare for the coming weekend.

Now a lot of things happened on Friday, I've been trying to figure out how much of this I can actually share. Lets start with this. I had some bad news Friday afternoon, news from home. Nothing I could do anything about but which made me quite worried. However, upon entering the prison for the day you are basically cut off from the outside world. The officers even tried to let me check my email (to get updates from my family) at lunch but we were unable to access even the most basic pages due to the security system. So I just had to wait the day out until I could leave and call home after both of our shows. Not my best day, but everyone was really there for me. Our guards did everything they could to try and get me in touch with my family, our cast was there for me and looked out for me all day. It was really touching how much everyone had my back.

Now this second story is the delicate one. See it has to do with the balance of power in the prison. Not everyone in the prison was entirely happy about our presence there. We disrupted the schedule, and heightened the security risks, and not everyone agrees about how valuable the arts can be. So even after the wonderful reaction from the officers on Wednesday there were still some unhappy parties. And one of these decided to push some buttons. Now our guys are not perfect, they are all in prison for a reason, but most of them have come a long way from the crimes they have committed. Many are very close to release, or at least transfer to D cat (the next step down, basically an open prison). And the very fact that they are allowed to participate in the show indicates that they have earned special privileges and are on the road to rehabilitation. Now our presence, and the work that we have been doing, has been to help with this process. We have been encouraging the guys to open up, to trust us, to do things completely outside of their comfort zone. All a very delicate process. I wont go into detail but basically someone tried to completely undermine that during our last weekend.

One of our guys was told that we had been bad mouthing him at the pub after one of the shows. This is a complete fallacy. The conversation in question was actually highly complimentary of this guy, and our words were deliberately twisted to convey a negative meaning. Needless to say this guy was pretty upset. I would be too if someone told me that my cast mates were badmouthing me at the bar. I think anyone would. And he came into the show that morning prepared to basically shut us all out. However, and I think this shows some of the measure of how far these guys have come during the process, after a few minutes he came and spoke to me to clear the matter up himself. Instead of snapping to a judgement he calmly talked things over and realized that we were all still rooting for him. Now this could have gone a completely different way, and I am very glad it turned out the way it did. Deliberately undermining someones confidence and trust like that is cruel, and can be incredibly damaging. And for someone who is still finding there feet in society it can be outright crippling.

Now add to all of this dynamic a major power outage. And I mean major. The last time we stopped the show all we had to do was reset the lights, a relatively simple procedure, merely time consuming. Not so in this case. Now the prison does have generators. So what kept happening was that we switched back and forth from grid to generator power. And our systems - lights, sound, everything - had to restart every time this happened. It was a mess. I think we stopped for over 45 minutes. Half of this was spent in pitch blackness. However the guys, once again, handled things well. Aside from some impatience backstage (felt by everyone, we were all pretty hungry and ready for a break at this point), people stayed in the moment. We had to stop and start several times, each time the energy being harder and harder to build back up - because of course this would happen right before all the big dramatic stuff right at the end. The guys went out and did another Q & A with the audience, done by the light of flashlights. They kept things pretty light, and the audience all seemed willing to sit there and wait for things to right themselves. Turns out the power had gone out in the entire surrounding area, not just the prison. So it was a major deal. But in the end everything turned out ok. We finally reached the end of the show and everyone took a much needed break.

After that things went pretty smoothly. The shows went really well. One of the guys had a major blank during his big number, but it was handled with a ton of flair. The other guys in the scene covered it incredibly well, it was actually kind of amazing to watch. But other than that, no big mishaps. No more power outages, no crises. Smooth sailing. And then we had to leave.

Leaving was really hard.

Yeah, I am not sure what else to say about that. It was emotional for everyone - the professionals and the guys alike. I always find the end of a show to be emotional, and sad. But this was especially so. You know with a regular show, that you will most likely see the majority of these people fairly soon. You'll do other shows, you'll hang out, the theatre world is pretty small. We are going back as a cast to visit the guys on Friday, so we will get to see them again. But it may just be the same thing all over. Right, that's all I can articulate about that right now.

I'll update again soon, because these last weeks have had their own challenges. But enough for now.

Gee Officer Krupke, What are We to Do?

Before I dive in to this week I just want to touch on the end of last week. Sunday night's performance was an interesting one, for a couple of reasons. First of all the guys were allowed to invite their families to this performance. I think they are allowed to invite them to a few of the other shows as well, but this was the first of them. So many of them had family members or friends in the audience. This made a lot of them rather nervous about performing. Its one thing to perform in front of a group of your peers its another entirely to invite family, and family who are complete outsiders to your situation, in to see the show. Most of them were a wreck of nerves and excitement in anticipation of the reactions their families might have.

Secondly we had some technical difficulties. Basically what happened was our lighting rigging went on the fritz. About half way through the show the director decided to stop the performance to sort this all out. She did point out that had we proceeded there would be some scenes in complete darkness, so it was rather necessary to get it fixed. However this did mean that we stopped for about half an hour. This is always unfortunate because it is very easy to lose the energy in moments like this. However our director, being amazing as ever, invites some of the guys out on stage to chat with the audience and have an informal Q & A. Now the last session like this went rather poorly, if you remember. This was a bit different. I think because it was friends and family asking the questions, and there were more guys who got involved, the tone of the whole thing was much friendlier. Genuinely curious, rather than belittling. And some of the guys really got in to it. Standing in the wings I couldn't quite hear the whole thing, but what I did catch was great. The guys talked about how the show has given them confidence, and about what was difficult about the rehearsal process. I really felt like they were allowed to have their own voice for a few minutes. So that was pretty cool. We were all pretty beat getting out of the show that much later, but I think it was actually a great experience.

It was really interesting meeting peoples families after the show. I tried to meet as many as I could, so I didn't really get a chance to chat with any of them for any length of time. This was partly on purpose. The guys get so little time with their family I didn't really want to impinge and take away any focus. But I do wish that I had taken the chance to chat with some of them more. I know it was hard for some of them, just having those few minutes after the show.

This is starting to get in to what I have been thinking about this week. The project itself has been amazing. I wouldn't trade this experience for anything. However it has also been really hard, especially in these final weeks. For example after a long rehearsal or a show the cast will normally go out together and unwind a bit. In this case, HALF of the cast does this. The other half get sent back to their wing for the evening. It is hard to have that very clear divide put back between us, after spending so long building the show together as an ensemble. We have grown quite close as a cast, and it gets harder and harder to leave the guys at the end of the night. It was incredibly difficult to drive away on Sunday knowing that they were really all just waiting for us to come back for the shows on Wednesday. A lot of them do have jobs in the prison, and they keep themselves busy, but a lot of them have mentioned how this is the only thing they have to look forward to. Its hard to walk away when you know how much it means to them.

I have had guys say to me that the 6 weeks working on the show is like 6 weeks out of prison. They have mentioned that they have seen us more during this time than they get to see their families in a year. Now I know they are in prison, and they aren't supposed to have it easy, but I do think there should be more programs like this one. Looking at how much the guys have changed during the process has been amazing. Ultimately the goal is rehabilitation so these guys can reenter society and not re-offend. Seeing how much these guys are starved for human company, and situations where they are treated like equals it is hard to walk away. Looking at the guys - the lack of self worth that they had walking in to the project, and how much it has changed them, you can sort of see how they ended up here. Now, I don't know everyone's story, and frankly I don't think I need to or really have the right to ask them. But, I know they have all made mistakes in their lives (Some of them I want to smack up side the head and ask them WHAT they were thinking). But they are all people. They all deserve to be reminded of that, and to have someone tell them that they are worth something, which I think most of these guys never really got before this.

I was pretty much a wreck after heading home on Sunday evening. Ultimately it has been a good thing to have two days away, to collect my thoughts and get a good nights sleep. But I am antsy to get back. I have missed the guys, and I have missed the girls in the cast, (we have also become very close working together on this project). I know it will be even harder to leave for good after the show ends, but I have to enjoy the time we have left. I know I cannot articulate all of the things I am feeling. And I am trying to be careful of how much I can put up here. But I at least want to get down some of the things I am feeling. I'm going to stop my ramble for this evening because we have to be up and out early to get out to there for a two show day. So off to bed I go, and then off to prison I go in the morning.

I cant wait!

Tonight, Tonight, Won't Be Just Any Night

After an absolutely epic weekend I am back at home in my own little flat. If I am being completely honest I am experiencing a bit of culture shock. The last few days have been life changing.

To pick up where I left off, Thursday. Thursday we had our first rehearsal with the band. Oh my goodness do they sound good. In my opinion there are few things that are not improved by the addition of a brass section, and this was no exception. The Bernstein music is absolutely incredible, so to add full orchestrations really takes the piece to a new level. First orchestra rehearsals always give the cast a bit of an energy boost, and I think the guys were really impressed by the band. I think they began to really feel like they were putting on a show. We worked through the music in the morning, and then ran the show in the afternoon. And it was great. The excitement in the room was palpable. However so was the anxiety.

See the next day, Friday, began our run. And to make things especially nerve wracking for the guys we not only had two shows (well technically an open dress and then our opening in the evening), but the afternoon show was the performance for all of their friends. Friday afternoon was our prisoner performance. I really think it was trial by fire for them. Most of them have never performed anything in their life, and to even take part in rehearsals was an incredibly scary thing.  Now, even as a professional, I always find it much harder to perform in front of a group of my friends. There is an extra level of stress that you don't get when you don't know the audience. You always want to perform your best, and are worrying whether or not you'll live up to their high expectations for you. You are also afraid of making a complete fool of yourself. Now imagine those feelings for someone who has never done anything like this before. And set them an audience of people who have very little exposure to theatre, and really anything else. I am not sure how I would have handled myself in their position. I think a lot of them were absolutely terrified. Actually I know that they were. And this terror manifested in a lot of different ways. There were some rash comments and bruised feelings by the end of the day Thursday as we got closer to the end of our rehearsal process. However the show itself was really coming together and I think at that point we really did need an audience. At one point one of the boys turned to me and said that he thought we needed another week. I had to tell him, honestly, that every show I have every worked on felt like it needed another week right up until we opened.

Friday was an absolutely amazing amazing day. For one thing it was my birthday. I don't think I will ever forget the year I spent my birthday in prison. The girls in the cast baked me a cake to share with the guys at lunch, and they all sang to me. I dont think there are all that many people that can say that. I had a room full of prison inmates sing happy birthday to me. It really made my day, I was really touched. I got many well wishes throughout the day. Many of the guys asked me if I had any big plans to celebrate, to which I would get to respond that I was opening a show with them! Certainly one of the best birthday evenings I could have planned.

Right, back to the story. Well Friday afternoon's open dress rehearsal was certainly a unique experience. I dont think I have ever performed in front of an audience that responded like that. They were very vocal, but amazingly supportive. All of them were cheering their friend on, and they audibly responded to most of the story. But all of it was positive. And you could tangibly feel when they got sucked in to the more dramatic elements of West Side Story. The room would go quiet and you could sense the concentration. The guys were incredible! I think that most of them really got a boost performing in front of their friends. And frankly I think it really did help them that they were the first audience. After performing for the other inmates any other audience would be all right!

I am not going to lie here, I had a moment of sheer terror stepping out on to the stage for the dance at the gym. Other than the leads, the women have very little to do in the show. I am in two scenes, and spend the rest of the time doing scene changes. Most of my time and energy during the rehearsals has gone towards supporting the guys, getting to know them and help them through the process. So until that very second I had not even thought about getting nervous. However, I got out on stage and had a sudden realization of who we were performing for. And even after working with nearly 30 inmates for over a month that moment was a bit of a kick to the stomach. However as soon as the lights came up on us, and I saw the rest of the guys up there on stage with us, I realized how much we were in this together. It was kind of amazing, knowing that we were a team. It didn't break down in to them and us, but all of us together as a cast.

The shows have all gone really really well. There have been a few heart stopping seconds where someone will drop a line or something will go wrong, but all of them have been handled incredibly professionally. One moment in particular was heart breaking. This guys had been rather shy the whole process, just coming out of his shell during the last week or so. And his character is one that none of us could really feed him the line. So when he lost his place there was the most amazing moment of suspensions as all of us waited to see what would happen. You could see him realize he was lost, get flustered, and then take a deep breath and collect himself and jump right back in to the scene.  I know there are pro's who couldn't do what he did in that moment. I also know that it could have just as easily gone the opposite way. I think had someone tried to jump in to help him it would have just pulled him farther into his panic at losing his line. It was a truly amazing moment.

I am going to take a break now, and collect my thoughts before I talk about the end of the weekend. There is so much emotion involved in this production I want to find the right words to share about it. I am just reminded of what many people said to me about taking on a project like this. The most frequent comment got was that it would be a life changing experience. And oh my goodness were they right about that.

Here come the Jets, Yeah

Well, here it is. The night before opening. (Ok, so I'm posting it the morning of. We didn't have internet last night). This week has been really incredible. Not necessarily fun, or easy, but still amazing none the less.

Lets start with last week. During the middle of last week we had several visitors to our rehearsal process. Naturally the sponsors want to come and see what we have been up to during the week, so several of them came and sat in on our rehearsal. It was very interesting to watch how this affected the boys. At first I think it totally threw them. All of a sudden, after four weeks of a rather intimate rehearsal process, there was this room full of strangers. After a while though they did relax a bit. I think they actually sort of got in to performing in front of them. And it was great practice for this week when they get a full audience. By the end of it I think they were rather excited about the prospect of putting this show up now. Then during lunch there was the inevitable schmooze with the donors. A few of the guys were invited to stay with us and chat with them about the project. They all did quite well, frankly they were better at mingling than I often feel when I am at similar events. Then there was a sort of question and answer panel. This actually sort of got to me a little bit. I may be a bit presumptuous here, but it felt kind of dehumanizing. I mean we had spent weeks building these guys up – treating them like professionals, trying to give them the respect that they are so often missing in the rest of their lives – and in come these people who have no idea what we have been working on, and they begin to ask questions. Really I think most of them were just incredibly curious about the project, which I cant blame them for, but it was the way they would address the guys. I am having a hard time putting it in to words, but it made me rather angry. It felt like they were spectators at a zoo, or some sort of freak show, which is so far from the way that we have been trying to treat all of them that although I know it was probably innocent it felt a bit offensive. It just rubbed me the wrong way.

Moving on. We got in to the space on Friday. And let me tell you (since we cant bring in cameras to take pictures) the set looks great. Its all brick, and chain link fence and scaffolding. Very simple, but rather effective. It is always exciting to get on the set for the first time. And I think for a lot of the guys Friday was the beginning of the realization that we would actually be performing soon. I forget how novel this is for all of them. And I think they forget how normal it is for us some times. I have had more than one guy comment to me about how he does forget that this is a job for us, because for them it has a whole other meaning.

After a very short, but completely enjoyable weekend, we all hopped back in the car Sunday evening and headed back out to begin tech. Monday morning starts bright and early, with everyone in costume looking absolutely stunning. It really is incredible how good these guys look. Especially because for five weeks we have seen them wearing nothing but warm ups and sweats, maybe jeans. And then they show up dressed to the nines in 50s style. There are of course some issues. A few of the guys really are not comfortable stepping outside of their personal wardrobe tastes, and have to be coaxed and bullied in to wearing what they have been given. But they do. And it is totally worth it. We start working through the show from the beginning, and make remarkably good time for a tech rehearsal. Everyone stayed relatively chipper all day, and there were only minor problems. I think everyone felt really good at the end of the day.

By day two everyone started flagging. Or maybe it was only me. No, I think in general things were a bit bumpier on Tuesday. With few exceptions these guys have never been in a situation like this, and although they were on the whole great about having to stop and start and the frequent repeats, they did start to wear by the second day. I don't think any of them really realized how tiring the process can be, even just standing around half the day, so there were some dust ups, but nothing too major. In fact most of the frustrations seemed to be among the professionals rather than the prisoners.

Wednesday saw our first EVER full run. Until Wednesday afternoon we had never even come close to running the show from beginning to end without stopping. I am not sure we had ever really run the show straight through even with stopping and starting. So to be completely honest, I wasn't sure we could do it. I think the guys are great and are doing some amazing work, but I wasn't entirely convinced that if someone dropped a line the entire thing wouldn't just fall to pieces. However, they surprised me. Not only did we get through the whole show, the guys did a great job of covering the moments that didn't go as planned. There were some botched scene changes and some missed lines, but on the whole nothing major. He show is by no means polished, but at least we have a show!

Now throughout the week we have been spending much more time with the guys than has been the normal schedule. For one thing we've been in now four days in a row, rather than two (the leads have had this schedule from the beginning, but not us chorus). And for another, the guys have been allowed to have lunch with us. I think part of it is practicality. There isn't enough time in our schedule for them to be carted away to have lunch elsewhere and then brought back. So we have all been picnicking together in the rehearsal room. And frankly, this has been great fun. I think it is safe to say that we have all grown really fond of these guys, so it is nice to get some time to actually chat with them and have real conversations. Rather than just between scenes and during tea breaks.

Right, I have to run now, so I don't have enough time to finish my thoughts. More installments to follow soon. Off to prison I go!!!

There's Hell, and Then There's Open Call Auditions

This week is all about doing things. Getting back out into the world and not letting myself sit around when I am not at rehearsal. So to start with I took myself out for a day of culture on Sunday.

Sunday was Chinese New Year. So a few of my housemates and I decided to hop on a train and head up in to Trafalgar square to join in the festivities. Unfortunately on the way one of our crew was delayed and had to join up later, and the other was called in to work at the last minute. No worries, we were meeting a friend there so I would be sure to have some company. Well, maybe not. I arrive at the very crowded square and proceeded to wait in the rain for over an hour. At this point the ceremonies had started, so I got to watch the firecrackers and hear some of the speeches, but being short and at the back of the crowd I wasn't truly able to see much of anything. Except for a sea of umbrellas that is. Ah well, the good thing about being stranded at Trafalgar Square is that the National Gallery is right there. So while I was waiting I wandered inside and spent some time with my good friends the impressionists, which really can make almost anything better. After a while everyone did show up and we wandered off for some tasty food!

Then in the evening I went to Silent Opera's production of Orfeo. Now this was a very interesting experience. I am not 100% sure why Silent Opera have chosen that name, being that they are not silent in any way shape or form. I can only assume it comes from the trend of silent raves  - where everyone is given a set of headphones. That way those participating in the rave can hear the music but it is silent for anyone observing. So, at the door we were each given headphones and invited in to the space, a warehouse right out on the water in the middle of the Docklands area. The space was very cool, in fact the design overall was really really interesting. However I think in the long run, the design ended up distracting from the production as a whole. They were going for the whole immersive theatre experience, which is something that I find amazing when it works right. The audience is moved from location to location, the actors move among the audience, it can be very cool. However this one didn't quite gel for me. Maybe it is because I am too short - as soon as we moved to the next location everyone was standing and so I missed half of the second act. I think if they had put a little bit more thought into the layout of the evening it would have worked a bit better. That being said the visuals were stunning (my favorite being the hundreds of glass jars suspended from the ceiling as you entered hell). And there were some lovely voices. The headphones weren't really used to their full potential until the final act, when they added a bunch of cool sound design. Before that they really only acted as amplification for the chamber orchestra. The biggest drawback of the evening I think was the lack of heating in the building on a night that it started snowing, my toes gradually going numb throughout the final act was a bit distracting. So all in all I enjoyed my trip to hell, however I think it didn't reach its full potential.

Continuing in our lovely theme of Hell, yesterday I dragged my housemates to an open call audition for the touring production of West Side Story. Now you may remember that my last open call was for A Chorus Line. Waiting 5 hours in line, in the rain, by myself, for a 10 second audition. This one was a bit better, but still an open call - which is never a pleasant experience. We only waited just over 2 hours before we were called in, and got about 30 seconds of audition time. I still managed to make a fool of myself, by missing the timing on the music and having to ask a question about it. It really wasn't a huge mistake but the guy running the audition kindly took the time to make me feel about 2 inches high. Ah well, such is the business. Looking at the girls held for a second round I really wasn't their type anyway, but I always hate feeling like I didn't perform at my best. But, at least we went. These calls are bound to get better every time.

This morning has already seen some productivity. I have called a few voice over agents, and have had two of them ask me to pass along my reel, which is always a good sign. So I just keep on truckin! The rest of today will be filled with research, errands and then pancakes! Because apparently in the UK Mardi Gras (or fat Tuesday) is Pancake Day. So as I made that huge effort to bring a box of bisquick back from the US I am subjecting people to American Style pancakes this evening. Should be fun! Then it's back to Prison tomorrow, and we begin the cycle all over again.

A Day in the Life

I am finding this whole process remarkably difficult to write about. Not because I dont have anything to say, but because I have so many thoughts that I cant put them in order. Let me just start by going through a typical day of rehearsals.

All of the actors are staying together in a cottage a little ways from the prison. So first thing in the morning there is a general scramble to get up and out for the day. Lots of hurried cups of tea, burnt sausages and crumpets usually make an appearance as we all bundle ourselves into our cars and head down the road. Once we arrive at the prison we congregate at the front gate and are given our id passes. We have a fantastic guard who has been assigned to be our liaison for the project. He knows us all by sight and will banter with us as we assemble one car load at a time. Occasionally there are questions about what we can and cannot bring in with us to rehearsal, but by now we basically have the drill down. Every once in a while there will be a random search and someone will have to empty out their bag and pockets, but since no one brings a whole lot to rehearsals this isnt too much of a hassle.

Once everyone is checked in and badged we head out to the rehearsal space. I always mean to count the gates we pass through, but I havent managed it yet. I think it is something like 6 gates, each of which has to be unlocked for us and then locked again once we have passed through. On our walk to the room we pass the gym. We usually get waves from some of the guys as we go past, there are usually at least one or two of our cast members getting in a workout before rehearsal.  Once in the room we have a few minutes to grab a cup of tea, lock up our stuff and start warming up before the guys start showing up.

Now these guys, these guys are kind of incredible. I don't want to invade anyones privacy, so I wont go in to too many specifics. I don't know a whole lot about most of them, only what they chose to share, and that is pretty personal to each of them. But the fact that they are part of this production is amazing. I am pretty inspired by them on a daily basis.

Spirits are high from the moment they arrive in the room. Everyone is chatty, and the energy is infectious. Soon the room is full and we begin our day. The rehearsals themselves are both very similar to every rehearsal I have been in, and completely different. For one thing most of the guys have no experience with this sort of process. So, sometimes the chatting gets a bit noisy, or someone will wander off for a drink of water in the middle of the scene they are rehearsing. But for the most part everyone is pretty attentive. There are moments where things don't go as expected, and there are times when things can get tense, however the rehearsals keep moving forward.

The amount of work and energy these guys are putting into this project is fantastic. There have been some amazing moments in rehearsals. Moments where you realize that although the room was buzzing with whispered conversations a few seconds before, now every single person is transfixed by what is happening on stage. Moments of incredible humor and levity - the number of times the whole room will burst into laughter is staggering. And incredibly moving moments - when the entire cast joins in to sing Somewhere with Tony and Maria, the day we closed the rehearsal with Maria's final monologue.

The days are exhausting, even though the women's chorus are only in a few numbers. With these rehearsals you really have to be in the room every second. For one thing you cant bring all that much in with you. I will often bring some knitting or a book to keep myself busy when I am not being used in a scene, but I cant bring knitting needles, and most of my books are on my kindle here, which is also a banned item. Aside from that though I sort of feel like I really do have to be attentive the whole time - as an example to those who aren't used to rehearsals, but also to support the guys while they are working. It is easy to forget how foreign this sort of thing is to people outside of the business. So we are all there to be as supportive and encouraging for these guys as they step completely outside of their comfort zone.

The flip side of that is that we also have to be on all the time, to watch what we say to these guys and how we interact with them. They are not professional actors and we need to remember that. These guys are all where they are for a reason, and we just need to be cognizant of that. To be completely honest there are moments that have made me a bit nervous. And every once in a while I do sort of remember just where I am and who I am working with. However, these moments are completely overshadowed by how much you can tell this project means to the guys involved.

So, even though I am only in rehearsals a few days a week I find myself rather tuckered out the rest of the time. That being said I do look forward to these rehearsals for the entire week until I get to head out on Wednesdays.

I doubt this will be a flawless production. I miss the amount of dance that normally goes into West Side Story, and the majority of the cast have no performance experience to speak of. Nonetheless, I think this will be an incredibly powerful show when we are done. I am so proud to be part of this production.

Go Directly to Jail: Do not pass go, do not collect $200

Before I tell you about my current project I need to catch you all up a little. I am now, officially a working actor in London, with a visa and everything. The process has not been an easy one, let me tell you. I genuinely believe that the border agency like to make things difficult on purpose, for their own entertainment.

The saga of my visa is another story entirely though. One that takes a long time to tell and is full of nail biting suspense. However I have another story for today so I wont get in to the gory details. Let me just say that after weeks of waiting, many hoops to jump through, and ridiculous last minute problems, I have obtained a UK work visa. This is what I have been working towards since I moved here, and it finally happened. I am still in a little bit of shock about it. Now, it is not for as long as I would like, and I will have to figure out how to renew my passport soon, but these are problems that I don't have to face just yet. So I will just enjoy the fact that I can stay here for a while.

Now how did this fantastic turn of events come to be? Well, that is what I want to tell you about today. You see, I have a job. I have been cast in a professional and paid production. And this production is unlike anything that I have ever worked on in the past. You see, this show is being produced inside of a jail. Yes, a jail. We are doing a production of West Side Story, in which more than half the cast are prisoners.

Now, I don't know about most of you, but before rehearsals began I had never set foot inside of a prison. Most of my knowledge of the inner workings of the prison system came from things like 'The Shawshank Redemption' and 'Prison Break', which I believe may not be hugely accurate. Before we were even allowed in to begin rehearsals every one of us had to go through some intense security screening. The story of my security screening is strikingly similar to the story of my quest for a visa, so I wont go in to all of the mind numbing details. Let me just say that it was a long and arduous search for about 10 times more paperwork than they had originally asked for.

Once that was all taken care of I was finally allowed in to rehearsals. These rehearsals are incredible. I have a very hard time wrapping my brain around everything that is going in to this whole process. I will fill you in on everything, but I need to collect my thoughts a little bit first. So, I will leave you with this for now, but you should expect another installment of the Adventures of Captain Kate sometime soon!